Awkward monologues in songs

Channel98

Don't yell or hit.
Feb 2, 2019
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"Oh, I'm sorry to bother you – but I want to share this song by a Scottish band called Looper. The entire song is a monologue about me and the Peugeot 403 that I drive. I wrote down some of the lyrics. Let me see. No, it's not in that pocket. Maybe this one. No. Well, I'm sorry. I can't find my notepad. Anyway, here is the song."


 
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semipenguin

Cheeseburger Connoisseur
Oct 11, 2008
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Van Halen seems to have quite a few.

Mean Street.

See, a gun is real easy
(This is Mean Street) In this desperate part of town
(This is home) Turns you from hunted into hunter, ah
(This is Mean Street) Go an' hunt somebody down
Wait a minute, ah
Somebody said "fair warning"
(This is Mean Street) Lord strike that poor boy down.



Panama.

Yeah, we're runnin' a little bit hot tonight
I can barely see the road from the heat comin' off
Know what I'm sayin'
Uhh, I reach down between my legs n' ease the seat back

 

IdRatherBeSkiing

Sherbet is NOT and NEVER WILL BE ice cream.
Oct 11, 2008
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Listening to Meatloaf "Bat Out Of Hell" album, they lyrics while colourful are a bit weird. And the opening monologue on the next song " You Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth (Hot Summer Nights)" is quite weird as well.

"Boy: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red rose
Girl: Will he offer me his mouth?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Will he offer me his teeth?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Will he offer me his jaws?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Will he offer me his hunger?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Again, will he offer me his hunger?\
Boy: Yes!
Girl: And will he starve without me?
Boy: Yes!
Girl: And does he love me?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Yes.
Boy: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses?
Girl: Yes.
Boy: I bet you say that to all the boys."

Classic but weird.
 

HecticArt

Administrator
Oct 19, 2008
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Toledo, Ohio
Listening to Meatloaf "Bat Out Of Hell" album, they lyrics while colourful are a bit weird. And the opening monologue on the next song " You Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth (Hot Summer Nights)" is quite weird as well.

"Boy: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red rose
Girl: Will he offer me his mouth?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Will he offer me his teeth?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Will he offer me his jaws?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Will he offer me his hunger?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Again, will he offer me his hunger?\
Boy: Yes!
Girl: And will he starve without me?
Boy: Yes!
Girl: And does he love me?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Yes.
Boy: On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses?
Girl: Yes.
Boy: I bet you say that to all the boys."

Classic but weird.
So far, that one gets my vote for most awkward.
 
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sadchild

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Mar 28, 2016
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On the VJ I'm listening to right now: Tierra "Together"

"Girl I want you to sit back and close your eyes. Think about all those wonderful times that we used to have together. Now I know things aren't the way they used to be right now, but they are going to get better some day and I know that."

Response:

"Boy I want you to sit back and close your eyes. Keep 'em closed. Good, now I can sneak out of here and never have to deal with your creepy ass ever again."
 

sadchild

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The 1992 almost-chart-topper "I Love Your Smile" by Shanice has a rap toward the end that devolves into a monologue that gets awkward.

I like the song (guilty pleasure) but this part goes from confidence to nonsense to anxiety to suddenly cheerful. Bizarre....

I'm showin' the life that I'm living
This is the life that I have and it's given to you
Yeah and it's true
La-dee-da
Twinkly dee
Do you, believe in a girl like me?
Shanice is the one for you to be with
But when I'm caught all alone
I start fessing
It's from a state of depression
And the thunder clouds of doubt move in
I begin to wonder
"Do you still love me?"
But after that
My whole world is beautiful *laughter*

 

sadchild

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I like this song but it's really about nothing. Even the guy who wrote the lyrics said, "A nonsense song. It’s just let’s all have some fun ... It’s a ‘hey, spaced out’ song rather than a deep and meaningful one." But at the end there's a small monologue that not only makes no sense, but has nothing to do with the rest of the song's lyrics.

[Spoken]
In the common age of automation, where people might eventually work ten or twenty hours a week, man for the first time will be forced to confront himself with the true spiritual problems of living


 

scotchandcigar

All I wanted was some steak
Feb 13, 2009
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The Sugarcubes were an Icelandic band that featured Bjork. They had a few hits in the US before she went solo. I've always heard that they sang the English language versions of their songs phonetically. So perhaps they don't know how horrible their lyrics are. The guy doing the monologue starts just before the 2:00 minute mark.

The Sugarcubes - Hit


A small story which never happened
I said ouch! This really hurts
That can't be this has been
Practiced for millions of years
Therefore we are
Yes, but I, I'm a boy
A small story which always happens
I said ouch! This really hurts
This could well be
But this has
Been practiced for millions of years
Therefore we are
Yes, but, you're a girl

You've put a seed inside me
And while you're away
It's growing silently
Starts in my stomach (to be a life)
Embraces my insides
And about to reach my heart