Do We Have A "stupid Things Happening In Florida" Subforum?
- Thread starter IdRatherBeSkiing
- Start date
In Shakespeare's Julius Caesar, Antony called Brutus's stabbing of Caesar "the most unkindest cut of all." I don't think "most unkindest" is grammatically correct – but I wonder what Antony would say about this incident:
www.nydailynews.com
Elderly fetishist to serve 3 years for botched dark-web castration
An elderly Florida man has been sentenced for the botched castration of a man he met via a website for eunuchs. Gary Van Ryswyk, 76, pleaded no contest Thursday to unlicensed practice of a health care profession resulting in serious bodily…
www.nydailynews.com
Well at least the operating room and instruments look completely new and sterile:
EDIT: Wow, this story just gets better and better...
Cops discovered that one of the property's bedrooms had been converted into a makeshift operating theater and they located the man's severed testicles inside of a a pink jar placed atop a bedside table.
In the bedroom, there was also a camera set up on a tripod and spare memory cards to record the horrific castration.
The man was purportedly told by Vanryswyk that the procedure would 'take around 45 minutes'. However, he quickly started to notice that Vanryswyk was 'constantly fumbling and dropping stuff.'
The procedure stretched on for more than three hours, with blood covering the walls and floor of the room.
in the months after the botched surgery, the man said he began to suffer from suicidal thoughts and 'regrets' ever having his testicles removed.
EDIT: Wow, this story just gets better and better...
Cops discovered that one of the property's bedrooms had been converted into a makeshift operating theater and they located the man's severed testicles inside of a a pink jar placed atop a bedside table.
In the bedroom, there was also a camera set up on a tripod and spare memory cards to record the horrific castration.
The man was purportedly told by Vanryswyk that the procedure would 'take around 45 minutes'. However, he quickly started to notice that Vanryswyk was 'constantly fumbling and dropping stuff.'
The procedure stretched on for more than three hours, with blood covering the walls and floor of the room.
in the months after the botched surgery, the man said he began to suffer from suicidal thoughts and 'regrets' ever having his testicles removed.
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Spaghetti attack!
www.thesmokinggun.com
Couple Arrested For Mutual Pasta Battery
AUGUST 2--Police responding to a 1 AM domestic disturbance found a Florida couple “covered in spaghetti” following a physical confrontation that resulted in the pair’s arrest on domestic battery cha
www.thesmokinggun.com
So they were arrested for the spagetti attack yet they declined to arrest her earlier for a knife attack? Florida has an interesting legal system. Spagetti is considered a lethal weapon where knives are not.Spaghetti attack!
Couple Arrested For Mutual Pasta Battery
AUGUST 2--Police responding to a 1 AM domestic disturbance found a Florida couple “covered in spaghetti” following a physical confrontation that resulted in the pair’s arrest on domestic battery cha
Mama Mia!Spaghetti attack!
Couple Arrested For Mutual Pasta Battery
AUGUST 2--Police responding to a 1 AM domestic disturbance found a Florida couple “covered in spaghetti” following a physical confrontation that resulted in the pair’s arrest on domestic battery cha
"The mutual combat--for which alcohol was a factor--led to Lannas and Rivera each being arrested for domestic battery."
I hope they paired the dispute with an appropriate wine - such as a nice chianti and some fava beans.
This schmuck's nickname is "Bubba." Apparently "Idiot" was already taken.
www.clickorlando.com
Florida man accused of stealing gator from golf course, threw it around to teach ‘it a lesson’
A Florida man who stole an alligator from a minature-golf course, swung it around by its tail and threw it into the air claimed he was teaching the reptile “a lesson,” according to the Daytona Beach Shores Department of Public Safety.
www.clickorlando.com
The guy's a real lookerThis schmuck's nickname is "Bubba." Apparently "Idiot" was already taken.
Florida man accused of stealing gator from golf course, threw it around to teach ‘it a lesson’
A Florida man who stole an alligator from a minature-golf course, swung it around by its tail and threw it into the air claimed he was teaching the reptile “a lesson,” according to the Daytona Beach Shores Department of Public Safety.
Another thing: is it customary for Florida mini-golf courses to keep alligators?
That upsets me. I mean be dumb to yourself or other adults who can defend themselves...when you screw with animals, kids or elderly it's extra egregious.
Those things have been around since the dinosaurs so they'll be fine but still, not cool to f with them. I wish it ate him.
Those things have been around since the dinosaurs so they'll be fine but still, not cool to f with them. I wish it ate him.