Adventures In Koopland

So we have this coworker dinner scheduled for Sat. We never do this. I think we did it once before and I talked about it here. But this time the ex will be there. Not really looking forward to spending time with her outside work. And since we'll be with other coworkers we will have to pretend. That won't be fun.
 
Well I'm about to blow $400+ on the ex cause I'm a chump.

Girl needs a new computer...This will be the second one I've bought her.

"You're the reason for my misery"

 
Don’t do it.
She‘s using you.
The relationship shouldn’t be about money or gifts or any of that. If she’s interested in you for a relationship, there shouldn’t be any attachments. This isn’t healthy for either of you.
 
scotchandcigar said:
Didn't she already pay you back $400 you gave her before?
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Yes, that was an exact amount I gave her for car repairs. She paid that back during an argument like 2 weeks ago.


HecticArt said:
Don’t do it.
She‘s using you.
The relationship shouldn’t be about money or gifts or any of that. If she’s interested in you for a relationship, there shouldn’t be any attachments. This isn’t healthy for either of you.
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To be honest she didn't ask for it. She asked for my receipt to go get it fixed.
 
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JHDK said:
To be honest she didn't ask for it. She asked for my receipt to go get it fixed.
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I didn't mean to sound so harsh Koop, but it doesn't sound like the best way to get meaningful conversation going again.
You've already had some static over money, it seems like it might be problematic to let it get between you two again.
 
Leave her alone. What does your new girl think about your attention to the old girl?


Sent from my iPhone6S using Tapatalk
 
New girl didn't work out. 1 date and we are done. Just not a good fit.

So I'm pretty much decided I'm gonna buy and give her this new laptop before work today. I'm relatively sure I'm grasping at straws here, whatever...I told you all I'm a chump. And to be clear she has explicitly told me not to do this. But I doubt she will turn it down.
 
So I got her the computer. It was a cheap HP one, only like $220. Shit man, I don't have the money to be buying this girl $400 laptops every 5 months.

It lead to pleasant work conversation (of course that's in front of coworkers so it doesn't really count) but then a very nice text exchange after work. She says she doesn't think we can get back together. I tell her I'm happy to wait and have learned it may take some real time this time around. She says the financial stuff doesn't need to happen and she already bought another more expensive laptop and will return mine and give me the money back. I'm positive that isn't true and tell her I don't want the cash back. In reality I think she will be keeping the laptop. She said she needed time to think. We ended it with me saying that we each know where the other stands and she saying that it was a nice conversation. I will win this girl back.

Meanwhile I spent $170 for a year of eHarmony. Gotta keep my options open.
 
I admire your optimism, JHDK, but I think it is almost never a good sign when a woman says she needs "time to think." In your case, however, it sounds as though everything will work out. My (unwanted) advice is to take the money and buy flowers and a cute little teddy bear for her.
 
Here comes some good old fashioned Koop oversharing.

So you all know by now I'm unemployed. With the savings I have now and nothing else I can last like 6-7 months with major cutbacks. However I also have my tax return and hopefully the Trump bailout and also hopefully unemployment.

But besides all that I have a saving grace. I was lucky to be born into a upper middle class family and my parents put a trust aside for me. It's not a huge amount, but to me it is. My aunt and uncle have control of it until I'm 40 and that's cool, they are teaching me how to invest it and all that and I need the time to learn. There is no one in the world I trust more than those two now that both my parents are gone. So anyway, while they have control of the full amount the divy out the stock dividends to me each month. It can vary wildly like in December I got $1200 (my aunt said that was for tax reasons) and then is January I got $50. But that seems to only be an end/start of year thing. Usually it works out to somewhere in the area of $500-$700. $700 is a rent payment, groceries and a little left over. So thank God I have that. It's a little piece of mind in these very stressful times.

However, my aunt has to mail the check to me, which is new starting with the February dividend. That would be fine but my roommates are very unreliable with the mail. They are honest people so I'm not worried about stealing but I am convinced when the mail comes they put it all in a pile and then eventually it all just gets thrown out...my unopened stuff included. So my aunt is sitting on two checks for me right now. We decided to run a test. I have my aunt sending me a card today. Just a card, nothing in it. I should get it by the latest on Friday. We'll see if the roommates give it to me. If not I think I will get a PO Box. At USPS it's $148/year in my zipcode. That's not so bad and worth the piece of mind. UPS is a total ripoff, they wanted $275 for pretty much the exact same thing.

And that's where I am right now. Super happy I have a bit of back up (thanks mom and dad) and testing my roommates. I don't want to move out right now cause that's too much money going out. My rent is really cheap and I'd like to keep it that way while I get through this. I'm interested to see how this goes. Maybe a PO Box will wind up being the best option.
 
scotchandcigar said:
Interesting.
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Yeah, I don't love the whole idea of it. Even though it will help me in the short term I will pay for it as an old man. Same goes for the Obama bailout and his was like 400 billion less. I know, different circumstances but same overall idea.
 
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